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扬眉吐气我承认我好胜心很强,尤其当对方认为我不行的时候，我越想证明给对方看。
当初报名这个课程的时候，居然被拒于门外，之后还得appeal，学校才愿意收我。
因此入学后，我不断鞭策自己，要取得好成绩，证明我的实力。
一番努力后，终于拿到梦寐以求的dean's list。
念本科的时候，都从未这么拼。
（老实说，我念本科时，太爱玩了，参加了许多活动。也许是年纪大了，这次念硕士，比较懂事，也比较用功了。）
下来，应该可以放轻松，把精力集中在督促孩子的学业和身心发展。
其实这几个月，边念书，还得边照顾孩子，实在够辛苦的。不过，收获很大。
因为有明确目标，把学习到的知识和实际工作挂钩，能够学以致用，所以学得很开心。
忙忙忙一转眼 ，就过了三个月。
原本以为当记者很忙，谁知道当学生更忙，作业接踵而来，根本没有喘气的空间。
下个月底就要考试了。脑袋挤了一大堆知识，不知道到时是否能在限制时间内都吐出来。
更重要的是，书是死的，人是活的。日后运用起这些新知识，能否得心应手？
这段日子，强烈感受到自己的不足。我做作业没问题，但开口发言时，却经常词不达意。
头脑再好，如果无法清楚地把自己的概念表达出来，无法说服他人，依然没用。 开学了我又再一次，把心交给一群刚认识两个星期的陌生人。
我原本以为，自己可以很潇洒地当位冷静的旁观者或理性的哲学家。
但是，我却再次动情，再次不自禁地想着：某某人会不会无法融入群体，某某人会不会觉得自己的意见不被重视，某某人会不会人生地不熟，某某人会不会思乡。
我干嘛没事找事来烦啊？但就是无法置身事外。
上回带团到广西也是如此。不由自主地去关心每一个团员，毫不设防地付出真心。但当时对象是一群小朋友。如今，这些人年龄都比我大，我干嘛没事干，一个一个地为他们操心？我也太好管闲事了吧。
我不知道，我付出真心后，有多少人会同样报以真心。或者，这又是另一次的一厢情愿？
然而，我很清楚，越是关心、越没有设防，就越容易受伤害。至少，感情越好，离别的时候越伤感。 新年了一转眼，没有写blog已经有几个月了，刚才差点忘了怎么login. 那一刹那，好害怕这些回忆的记录，就这么不见了。
唉，有时难免想：我是不是太过眷恋这些回忆了？如果曾经发生的事情忘记了，那是否表示它就有如没有发生过？
一个人死后，如果没有人记得他/她，他/她是否就有如不曾存在？
我努力地希望在有生之年，在这片土地上，遗留下我的痕迹，但是我有时觉得，自己有如在茫茫大海里的一条小鱼，或是掉入水中的小石头，是多么的微小，少了我，海洋依旧。我触碰过的地方，虽然也曾经起涟漪，但很快地，就恢复到之前的样子了。
在岁月这长长的道路上，我短暂的人生，根本微不足道。
想到这里，我就感慨，人活着到底是为了什么？
当然，我可以选择乐观地想，我所有的烦恼，其实也非常微不足道，但也可以悲观地想，我所有的成就与贡献，同样也微不足道。
我希望自己能够乐观，但我天生是个悲观的人。
因此，我又带着微微惆怅的心情，迎接这个新的一年。
调皮的彦彦一个月没写blog了。已经变得越来越懒惰。别说blog，连facebook都懒惰上。
工作比较忙吧。而且一有空，宁愿多花时间陪两个小瓜。
最近才终于一次过，整理小彦满月至今的照片。（洗照片就接近200块钱了，800多张呢。）
四本相簿装得满满的，也很有满足感。
回顾小彦的成长过程，充满了美好回忆。
他现在好“皮”哦。很会扮鬼脸，很会笑，很会做一些奇怪举动逗你笑。
有朋友问我，他会爬了吗？早就会了。而且还爬得很快。 他很喜欢看电视，尤其是广告和“意难忘”。有没有搞错？对啊，就是那部超级长命的台湾连续剧。他一听到片头曲，就会爬到电视机前。大概是在我肚子就已经听到习惯了吧。哈哈。
他现在最喜欢的游戏是躲猫猫(peekaboo)，总会ga ga 大声笑。他也很怕痒哦，搔他，他也会gee gee ga ga 地笑个不停。
很调皮，经常放着自己的玩具不玩，去抢哥哥手上的玩具。要不，就是去玩电脑键盘、电视机、speakers等等。他今天刚发现打印机有个按钮，按了前面的盖就会打开。他刚开始吓一跳，后来就一直玩得不亦乐乎。
小彦听到喜欢的音乐，就会站起来摇屁股。有时摇着摇着，突然失去平衡坐下，他还会觉得很好玩，哈哈大笑。
现在还开始学走呢。 他会推着小凳子走，就像哥哥小时候那样。有时还贪心一次推两个，结果stuck 住，就呱呱叫。 脾气有些坏哦，他要某样东西（如遥控器），如果不给他，他会发脾气。还有肚子饿和爱睏时，也会发脾气。 不过，还是很可爱啦。 祝小翔生日快乐明天是小翔4岁生日。重温他小时候的照片，很惊讶，他怎么一眨眼，就从当时的娃娃，变成现在的小男孩。
两兄弟一个像爸爸一个像妈妈，而且弟弟圆圆的，小翔又高又瘦。现在看回旧照片，原来小翔以前也是圆圆，好可爱哦，只是后来“拉长拉瘦”了。
弟弟出世后，小翔这哥哥突然在大家心中成了大孩子。但其实他还是个幼儿。依然会撒娇、会想大人抱。
想起最近总是在骂他，心里有些过意不去。
毕竟，他还只是个小孩。
祝小翔生日快乐，也希望我这个做妈妈的，也可以快乐地接受他成长过程中的磨合。 20082008Today is 20 Aug 2008. It is indeed special to be here in Beijing to celebrate Beijing 2008.
It is more than a sporting event. It is a massive party and MEGA performance that Beijing, and in fact, e whole of China has put up for he world.
While I am happy for them, it is only when I am here that I am very aware that I am not a part of them. Yes, we r all chinese, but somehow I feel more Singaporean and v much a foreigner in Beijing. I am very conscious of my different accent, my different habits, my different lifestyle, my different mindset. It is this difference that hits me strongest when i am here.
I enjoy being here, but Singapore is the only place I would call HOME. 亲身体验北京在北京约30小时，就已经有许多东西让我留下深刻印象。
太累了，先把写给朋友的email的部分内容给贴上，明天在补充中文内容和照片。
1) Sponsor pavillions
It is v interesting how the various sponsors presented their info. Johnson & johnson specially impressed me
( they have this panels where they got ordinary pple to say what it means to build a caring world. also they have a mini 兵马俑 exhibition where they shared how their medical technology- anti fungal medicine - is used to preserve e artefacts)
These sponsor booths are quite a show on their own. Queues r v long and of course it helps tt they sometimes give out freebies and souvenirs too. Didnt get any myself though =< (all gone by e time i visit)
in fact there was sooooo many pple everywhere tt even the "supermarket" (souvenir shop) had a queue of a few hundred pple at least. I skip that altogether.
I also found the China Story section which they presented the major province one by one very interesting. Not very indepth, but good as an intro to foreigners, n very colourful.
2) Inside the olympic garden, almost all the artistic sculptures turned into children's playgrounds. They were climbing up and down and having a great time. And China parents seem to be less protective. i would imagine spore parents screaming or not allowing their kids to even climb up.
Many people were also having picnic, or even sleeping under trees. Even without seeing any match, e olympic garden is quite an enjoyment because there is so much to see.
Not just the architecture, e exhibitions, e scenery (these r hardware), but also the software aspect, which r all e pple who have really immersed themselves in e olympic mood.
It's just soooo different being here versus watching all these on e news.
3) the olympic country clubs culture is interesting too. These are efforts by individual embassies, together w their national sponsors..
There are a few. Heineken Club, Bud Club (Budweiser), Canadian House, London House etc. some r only by invitation.
For Heineken Club (Dutch house), all u need is to show your passport. all foreigners r welcome. That's where I went. The whole place was Orange in colour, naturally... The venue was converted from a chinese exhibition hall which has very traditional chinese architecture. They hung some really cool orange colour chinese lanterns w dutch logo on top, so it was really a good combination. There was an exhibition which featured Dutch olympics achievements, they had a live band, dutch food, .. dutch olympic t shirts n other items r for sale,..... very well designed exhibition and very fun party.....Enjoyed myself and found many inspiring things to share w YOG. 4) The managing of Beijing volunteers is quite an impressive thing. heard they got more than 10,000 volunteers. Many foreigners working here have signed up w sponsors such as China Mobile to volunteer as traffic controllers too.
(Also, their uniform etc have become a collectors' item outside coz they made limited only for these pple.)
巨人的脚印那天观看北京奥运开幕仪式，演出的规模、精确程度、震撼力让人叹为观止。
有一幕出现一个个激光（或烟花？）大脚印跑向体育场。我脑海里立刻想到“一步一脚印”。
这场开幕向世界展示了中国这个巨人的实力和潜能。
但未来的路还很长，巨人是否会受到世界欢迎或畏惧，就得看巨人能否带着世界一同前进或是将世界踩在脚下。 开心宝宝小彦很可爱，有时可以笑个不停。要知道小宝宝笑起来是怎么个样？我upload了三个youtube片段。小彦笑起来就是这样。
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